Haven’t been able to write for a few months. With everything going on in the world and my own displacement I’ve been very preoccupied and found myself struggling to put pen to paper.

The world we are living in I barely recognize anymore and on top of the new stresses of everyday life we the parents of addicts have the old pressures still looming.

Wear a mask. Worry about our children having clothes. Wash our hands. Worry they have had a shower in the last month. Careful to not get virus. Worry they have everything but the virus.

It’s constant state of panic for me these days. Which way do I turn? All I wanna do is run. Run as far away as I can. Would I be able to? Could I manage to not have to be involved in every catastrophe? Should I give myself permission to let go? Could others actually appreciate me for what I do and give.

And the answer to all that is a big resounding NO!

In a world of self-absorbed entitled people. Human respect and decency have all but vanished. To try and survive the madness means we become invisible. Silent to the chaos. Hiding in the shadows hoping we won’t be noticed because then and only then are we needed.

I must apologize for the tone in which this is being written but i am only human. Only a mom and only able to put up with so much before i too find myself in the bleak part of my mind when I can not handle the dark skies of reality.

Maybe that is what keeps me sane in the insanity of addiction!